Just The One Of Us: Making Time For Yourself When You Live With A Partner

Just The One Of Us: Making Time For Yourself When You Live With A Partner


It’s a delicate subject, when you live with your significant other and you don’t see much of them, that idea of making time just for you can seem like a bit of an insult to the other person, but it’s essential! We’ve all got to have a little bit of alone time because this is how we can make ourselves better people. But when you’ve got someone in your life that you only see for a few hours in the evening and you both work crazy hours, what is the best way for you to negotiate this situation, and what are your options?

Explain How It Benefits You Both

Some people don’t like the idea of alone time, because they think it means they’ve got to sit still with their thoughts, or it’s just lying on the couch scrolling through social media (yet again). But, if you are after something that is for you, you’ve got to explain to your significant other how it benefits you both. After all, if you’re someone who suffers from depression or anxiety, taking time to yourself so you can practice mindfulness, or just going for a walk, can decompress you and so you feel like a better person- You don’t have to buy a motorbike like you’re in some mid-life crisis! And sometimes, there are things that we want to do that doesn’t require the other person to give their input. Maybe you like to journal, or you spend time on online casinos like Critiquesdecasino.com? If you are craving this alone time, clearly it’s for a good reason. So you have to show the other person the positives.

It’s Not Like You Are Out Every Night!

If you ask for alone time, maybe the other person thinks that you are using this as an excuse to go hang out with your friends in the pub, but alone time is a way for you to feel better. And it’s important for you to ensure your partner trusts you. If you are with someone that doesn’t like being by themselves, you have got quite a challenge ahead of you. But the benefits of being on your own are numerous. Once you get over the initial fear of being bored, you realise you can thrive on your own initiative.

What Rejuvenates You?

Time to ourselves isn’t just a way for us to take time out from the daily grind, but if you’re someone that striving for self-improvement, it’s essential for you to do this. Some of the most beneficial practices are things you can do yourself. Whether this is exercising, meditation, or just watching a video online on how to be a better version of yourself. There are numerous ways for you to improve- it’s not always beneficial to do it in a group, chanting like a bunch of monks! On Lifehack.org there are some tips for you to improve yourself in a practical sense. And this is something that is greatly underestimated in a world where we share everything on social media. When we are alone, the temptation can be to take a picture of where we are and put it online. But this ties into our fear of missing out. If we can get over this initial fear of being on our own, we actively begin to search for opportunities to be by ourselves. And when you live with someone who doesn’t get this, it can be a task to try and explain it. But, you’ve got to let them discover this by themselves. In the meantime, taking the opportunity to sit in a back room, maybe reading a book, or just enjoying the silence for once, can make you feel more relaxed. In this hyperreal world where we are constantly on the go, our brains are so full, it’s hardly a surprise that stress and anxiety are so prominent. And this is where alone time can really improve us.

But if you are struggling to make your case, compromise works best; one night for the two of you, one night for yourself, and repeat. Once this pattern develops, your significant other will have to function under their own steam, and before you know it, you will both have quality time together and apart. And this is something that, in relationships, is not spoken about as much. Being alone can actually help your relationship. And it’s not just about improving yourself or doing the things that you want to do by yourself, time alone can give you that space to think about everything you want in life, and be a better partner for it. Don’t fear being on your own because it’s actually very good for you!

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